Heavily Weighted

I have still not found a way to lose weight; and weight remains my largest impediment. Am in NCW now, and have access to a propa' climbgym; and am using that a lot, i'd say. I haven't been on the mt. bike yet, as the trails are still melting; but i have been running more than i have in many years. So the cardio lacketh not.

But i'm still fat.

I haven't been lifting much because i hurt my right biceps, and i can't seem to stop climbing long enough to let it heal fully. But i am doing i think more cardio (again, mostly running) within a proper (and so far gainful) climby season than i've heretofore managed. Have also been hiking some on off days.

On the diet front, i've kinda settled into the standard breakfast/lunch, then have been trying to basically eat raw veggies for supper. That generally ends up being a salad with oil and vinegar. I've managed to cut the meat out at night.

And yet, i'm still finding some way to keep it high-calorie enough that i've lost nary a pound. It's odd, 'cuz i spend decent swaths of the day feeling fairly hungry. I almost never leave off feeling like i've overeaten. And yet the flab clingeth, notwithstanding.

I would like to get a hold on what i'm doing wrong, exactly--not in some emotional "poormei'msofrustrated" sort of way, but more quantitatively. And i say more quantitatively, because knowing me as i do, if i don't keep things very simple, very formulaic, and not overly contrived, i'll fail. Case in point, i tried a couple of weeks ago to keep a notebook about me in order to keep a diet journal. I think i managed it for two days. And that's not to say it was entirely unproductive--it did show me how many calories are in some of my add-ins. It's pretty easy to take 'er back to maintenance intake level with an extra Tbsp of almond butter, or an extra handful of nuts, or the whole avocado instead of half. So super easy to add in an extra 150 calories here and there, and that'll be the difference between losing and maintaining.

But even with the useful visual on that, i can't seem to get a good grip on how to fix it definitively. Basically, i feel like i have breakfast and lunch more or less covered. Not overeating, it's good nutrition, sustainable, and i'm hungry by supper. So it comes to the night meal. And it seems that practically anything i make can become (and in every case manages to become) a substrate for more calories than i can have in order to lose weight.

So 1/4 cup oats with chia seeds, hemp seeds, olive oil, spices and blueberries finds a way to be too much food. Spinach, tomatoes, olives, onion, garlic, oil and vinegar and hummus or almond butter finds a way to be too much food. Maddening to be sure; but pretty dang consistent.

So i'm thinking about keeping daytime the same, and just having maybe a protein supp at night. Sounds dumb, 'cuz i've tried similar tactics in the past, and i think i always find a way to cheat. But it's really quantifiable, and really simple to reckon whether i've been true to the plan or have cheated. Just have to gear up for being hungry every night.

I do think it'll also ramp things up metabolically if i can find a way to no live on a steady diet of cortisol. The stress will end--if God allows it--when i have my tribe with me again, and the job is less chaotic.

We'll see. But the weather's getting mighty nice, and soon there'll be mt biking to do.